Stress ➡️ Science ➡️ Serenity
Helping you to read yourself better...
Welcome to the Uncouple® blog! I'm glad you're here and I'm hoping that you'll find some gems along the way to help you take control of the stress in your life.
The catalyst
It's taken a while but I'm finally blogging. It's been on my to-do list since I launched the Uncouple® website exactly two years ago but as a solopreneur, that to-do list is, well, you can imagine. A blog felt more like a nice-to-have for my business rather than essential. The funny thing is, I have come to realise that many will view my services as a nice-to-have, despite me knowing that they are absolutely essential to pretty much everyone. Over the past couple of years, I have also come to understand that this blog is just as important as my services. It will help me spread awareness about the silent killer that is stress and do so in a way that is easily accessible.
Who am I?
I'm Helen, founder of Uncouple® and the concept of mesotrauma® (I'll explain what that actually is in a future post). I spent over a decade in the legal industry having studied law both during and after university. The first half of my time in law was spent within divorce litigation and the second half was as a people and process manager, hence the specialism of supporting people through the divorce journey and during career crises. You can read more about me here if you're interested. I learned a lot during this time but there was something I both experienced and witnessed throughout that unknowingly led me to founding Uncouple®.
The Why
My reason for founding Uncouple®? An inner pull to build my own company and make my grandmother proud, combined with my innate desire to help and leave a legacy that benefits others. Initially I just thought I'd be supporting those who used to be my clients in the legal industry - supporting them through and beyond their divorce. Then I started to attract clients in 'career crisis' and noticed that my work was in fact needed during transitions - the life events that cause us stress. This can of course include divorce and career crises, as well as marriage, bereavement, birth of a child and so on.
As I continued along my journey, I realised how absolutely everything has some sort of link back to stress. How much it affected me in my life and how it was affecting those around me. It was then that I decided to go all in on stress.
Why I'm so determined to end the stress epidemic
My time in the legal industry was exceptionally rewarding. It gave me the opportunity to help those in need, provided me with skills that I otherwise wouldn't have and imparted some of the knowledge I now use to support others. There's a but though and it's a big one. I witnessed and experienced first-hand the industry's inordinate level of stress and the struggle of those working within it. Now as a founder, I can see that keeping stress at bay whilst running a business is just as challenging. In fact, stress is a constant, just as change is, yet many of us go through life ignoring this. We don't realise that, regardless of the hats we wear in life, we are exposed to stressors daily, which activates our body's innate fight or flight response. This is wearing our bodies down. It's like our foot constantly pushing down on the accelerator pedal with the handbrake on.
I decided that enough was enough and there needed to be a shift. We should no longer view high stress levels as normal nor wear it as a badge of honour, completely ignoring the potential consequences it'll have at some point later down the line. Coincidentally, my why came full circle when I realised that the grandmother that inspired me to start my business and who was an incredibly resilient and innovative businesswoman, most likely passed from stress-induced cancer. She ate well, didn't smoke, lived in a country where it was sunny most days of the year and was always mobile. She gave cancer no reason to target her other than the significant stressors in her life (sadly there were many). Of course I cannot say for certain that stress was the cause but the impact stress can have on the body is immeasurable but often silent until it's caused serious damage.
It's often during life events that people tend to feel most stressed. In an ideal world though, such a substantial stress response to external events wouldn't happen and/or cause a tipping point for those that have been consciously or unknowingly ignoring their stress for years. This is why Uncouple's work is so vital and why this blog is too. If I can get the message out there in an accessible, digestible and educational way, I will.
What to expect
Fun, facts, tools - whatever feels helpful and authentic to share. One message I always want to spread and make clear is that we are surrounded by stressors and the stress they create because everything is energy and 'stress energy' can be transferred to you from others and from you to those around you. Ever felt drained after leaving a funeral or spending time in A&E? That's why. I'm on a mission to change that through this blog and the services I offer but I need your help.
The truth is, people don't know what they don't know, so the more people that are aware of the blog, the better. Then they can freely learn about the dangers of ignoring stress. If you've read this far, please share it with your loved ones, your network, or even a stranger who appears to be having a bad day (if you feel so inclined!). It takes seconds and the impact could be life-changing. The power of knowledge, not feeling as though you're alone in feeling a certain way and knowing support for how you feel exists, is not to be underestimated.
The Uncouple® Network
Not a network in the traditional sense. We don't meet or know who else is in the network with us but we do share a common goal - wanting to be part of the journey to end the stress epidemic by improving our own health and the health of those around us. Whether you want to learn, support, get support or a combination, just confirm your interest by providing your first name and email address in the footer below and become part of a growing network of 'Uncouplers'. I look forward to keeping in touch (not too often though - constant, spammy emails are a stressor too!). Until next time...
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